| Week-Day Religion |
Chapter 7 |
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Before marriage young people are on their good behavior. They do not exhibit their infirmities. Selfishness is hidden under garments of courtesy and gallantry. Each forgets self in romantic devotion to the other. The voice is softened and made tender, and even tremulous, by love. The music flows with a holy rhythm mellowed by affection’s gentleness. Everything that would make an unfavorable impression is scrupulously put under lock and key. So there is harmony of no ordinary sweetness made by the two young lives, unvexed by one discordant note.
Marriage is a great mystery. “They twain shall be one flesh” is no mere figure of speech. Years of closest, most familiar, most unrestrained intimacy brings lives very close together, but there is still a separating wall which marriage breaks down. The two lives become one. Each opens every nook, every chamber, every cranny, to the other. There is a mutual interflow, life pouring into life. There may have been no intention on the part of either to deceive the other in the smallest matter or to cloak the smallest infirmity. But the disclosure could not, in the very nature of things, have been any more perfect. Each stood in the vestibule of a house, or at the most sat in its parlor, never entering any other apartment. Now the whole house is thrown open, and many hitherto unsuspected things are seen.
Too often the restraint seems to fall off when the matrimonial chain is riveted. No effort is longer made to curb the bad tempers and evil propensities. The delicate robe of politeness is torn away, and many a rudeness appears. It seems to be considered no longer necessary to continue the old thoughtfulness. Selfishness begins to assert itself. The sweet amenities of the wooing days are laid aside, and the result is unhappiness. Many a young bride cries herself sick half a score of times before she has been a month a bride, and wishes she were back in the bright, happy home of her youth. Oftentimes both the newly wedded pair become discouraged and think in their hearts that they have made a mistake. And yet there is really no reason for discouragement. The marriage may yet be made happy. There is need only for large and wise patience. The two lives require only to be brought into harmony, and love’s sweetest music will flow from two hearts in tender unison. But there are several rules which must always be remembered and observed.
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